Okay, let’s be real for a second. Dating in 2023 feels like trying to solve a Rubik’s Cube blindfolded. You think you’ve got it figured out, and then—bam!—someone ghosts you after three amazing dates. Or worse, you match with someone who’s clearly just here for the Instagram aesthetic. 🙃
But here’s the thing: I’ve been through it all—the highs, the lows, the “why did I even swipe right?” moments—and I’ve learned a thing or two about finding love and happiness in this chaotic modern world. So, grab your favorite drink (wine, coffee, kombucha—no judgment here), and let’s dive into the messy, beautiful, and sometimes hilarious world of dating.
First off, let’s talk about expectations. I used to go into every date with a mental checklist: “Do they have a stable job? Do they like dogs? Can they handle my obsession with true crime podcasts?” Spoiler alert: this approach didn’t work. I was so focused on ticking boxes that I forgot to actually enjoy the process.
Here’s what I’ve learned: dating isn’t about finding someone who fits your pre-written script. It’s about discovering someone who adds something unexpected and wonderful to your life. Maybe they’re not your “type” on paper, but they make you laugh so hard your stomach hurts. Or maybe they introduce you to a hobby you never thought you’d love (shoutout to the guy who got me into rock climbing—who knew?).
Now, let’s address the elephant in the room: apps. Love them or hate them, they’re a big part of modern dating. But here’s my hot take: it’s not about which app you use; it’s about how you use it. I’ve had friends who treat swiping like a part-time job, endlessly scrolling for the “perfect” match. And guess what? They’re still single.
Instead of swiping mindlessly, try being intentional. Set a time limit for your app usage, and focus on quality over quantity. I’ve found that having a few meaningful conversations is way more fulfilling than juggling 20 mediocre ones. And don’t be afraid to make the first move! I’ve sent the first message more times than I can count, and it’s led to some great connections.
Another thing I’ve learned is the importance of self-awareness. Before you can find the right person, you need to know yourself. What are your deal-breakers? What are your non-negotiables? And—here’s the kicker—are you actually ready for a relationship?
I’ll admit it: I’ve been guilty of jumping into relationships because I was lonely or bored. But those relationships never lasted because they were built on shaky foundations. Now, I take time to reflect on what I truly want and need in a partner. It’s not always easy, but it’s worth it.
And let’s not forget about communication. In the age of texting and DMs, it’s easy to misinterpret tone or intention. I’ve had my fair share of “wait, what did they mean by that?” moments. The solution? Be upfront and honest. If you’re not into someone, say it kindly. If you’re feeling unsure, ask for clarity. It’s better to have an awkward conversation than to waste time guessing.
One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is to embrace the journey. Dating isn’t a straight path to happily ever after; it’s a winding road with ups, downs, and a few detours. Some dates will be amazing, and others will be total disasters (shoutout to the guy who showed up wearing a fedora—never again). But every experience teaches you something about yourself and what you’re looking for.
Finally, don’t forget to have fun. Yes, dating can be frustrating, but it can also be an adventure. Try new things, meet new people, and don’t take it too seriously. Some of my best stories come from dates that didn’t work out romantically but gave me a good laugh.
So, here’s my advice to you: be open, be authentic, and don’t settle for anything less than what you deserve. Love is out there, and it’s worth the wait.