Let me paint you a picture: It’s 9:07 AM, I’m clutching a latte that’s 80% whipped cream, and my brain’s still replaying last night’s Bridgerton episode. Then BAM – my manager slides into my Zoom DMs asking if I’ll “just quickly” take over the Thompson account. Again. My mouth says “Of course!” while my inner monologue screams “WHY DO I ALWAYS DO THIS?!” 🚨
Sound familiar? Two years ago, I was the human equivalent of a “Kick Me” sign in meetings. Then I stumbled on a Harvard study revealing that women apply for jobs only when they meet 100% of qualifications, while men apply at 60%. My soul left my body. We’re literally gaslighting ourselves before the interview even starts!
Here’s the tea ☕: Confidence isn’t about feeling ready – it’s about showing up while terrified. I started experimenting:
1. The “Fake It Till You Make It” Science Hack
Neuroscience nerds (shoutout to Dr. Tara Swart’s research) proved that acting confident literally rewires your brain. I began power posing in bathroom stalls before big presentations – think Beyoncé, not T-Rex. Within weeks, my “umms” decreased by 73% (yes, I counted).
2. The Art of Strategic Interruption
MIT researchers found women wait 2.6x longer to speak in meetings. So I created the “Polite Bulldozer” technique: When John-from-Finance starts his third monologue, I smile and say “Building on John’s point…” with the determination of someone grabbing the last sale-dress at Zara.
3. Failure Resume Trend
Instead of hiding mistakes, I now showcase them like TikTok bloopers. My “Epic Fail Portfolio” includes sending a client email meant for my BFF (“PLS let’s get margs after this hellscape 😭”). Turns out vulnerability is the ultimate power move – clients now request me specifically because I’m “relatable.”
4. The 11th Commandment: Thou Shalt Not Apologize for Existing
I tracked my daily apologies: 47. FORTY-SEVEN. For things like… existing near the printer. Now I replace “Sorry, can I ask—” with “Here’s my perspective—” using the same tone as when I tell my cat he’s not getting second breakfast.
The Plot Twist 🎭
After six months of this experiment? Got promoted. Client satisfaction scores doubled. But the real win? Watching Jessica from marketing start doing bathroom power poses. We’re now a squad of unapologetic latte-sippers taking names.
Your turn, babe. The next time someone expects you to shrink – spill your coffee (metaphorically), flash your best “mess-with-me-and-die” smile, and take up ALL the space you deserve. The boardroom’s about to get a serious upgrade. 💋