Okay real talk ā when was the last time you heard someone say “menstruation” out loud without that awkward side-eye? Last week at brunch, my friend mouthed “Iām cramping” like she was confessing to tax fraud š. Weāve been conditioned to treat our cycles like some dirty secret, and honestly? Iām over it.
Letās start with the ick factor. A 2023 study in Journal of Health Psychology found 68% of women still use code words for their periods (“Aunt Floās visiting” anyone?). But hereās the kicker ā participants who openly discussed menstrual symptoms reported 40% less cycle-related anxiety. My personal experiment? Last month, I told my male coworker “I need to adjust this meeting ā my uterine lining is evacuating like itās a fire drill.” His confusion was priceless, but guess who didnāt fake-smile through meeting cramps?
Now letās talk about the wellness industrial complex. Suddenly everyoneās selling $80 “moon cycle” crystals but ignoring actual biology. I fell down this rabbit hole after passing out at yoga from ignoring iron deficiency (pro tip: kale smoothies > manifestation journals when youāre bleeding buckets). Nutritionist Dr. Lee (name changed) explains: “Menstruation isnāt mystical ā itās a clinical process consuming 10-30% of your daily iron needs.”
The workplace horror stories? Endless. My friend Emma (not her real name) nearly got written up for keeping tampons in her desk. Meanwhile Japanās had menstrual leave policies since 1947! But hereās the plot twist ā cycle syncing boosted my productivity more than any corporate policy. Tracking my follicular phase for creative work and luteal phase for admin tasks? Game-changer.
Letās get spicy about pleasure. Did you know cervical position changes through your cycle? I didnāt until my 30s! Our sex ed classes taught us to fear pregnancy but never how ovulation affects libido. Last Valentineās Day, I scheduled date night around my fertile window ā letās just say my partner didnāt complain š.
The real tea? This isnāt about mandatory period talk. Itās about refusing to organize our lives around societyās discomfort. Last month I bled through a white skirt at a client lunch. Instead of the usual panic-and-shame tango, I said “Natureās artwork ā happens to 1.8 billion people daily.” The client? She high-fived me and shared her endometriosis story.
So hereās my challenge: Next time someone whispers “Do you have a… you know…” in the bathroom, hand them a tampon while loudly discussing clot texture. Letās make the world squirm until it learns to cope. Our cycles arenāt gross ā theyāre literally why humanity exists. Now whoās with me? šŖš¼