Hey there, mamas! Today I wanna spill the beans on this whole parenting with purpose thing and how I’m on a mission to raise some seriously confident kiddos.
You know, when I first became a mom, I was like a deer in headlights. I had no clue what I was doing. I mean, sure, I read all the books and blogs, but nothing really prepares you for that moment when you hold that tiny human in your arms and realize you’re responsible for shaping their whole world. But over time, I’ve learned a few tricks and had some aha moments that I think are worth sharing.
One of the first things I realized is that confidence starts with us, the parents. Our kids are watching our every move, like little sponges soaking up everything we do. If we’re constantly doubting ourselves or being negative about our own abilities, how can we expect them to grow up feeling confident? So, I made a conscious effort to work on my own self-esteem. I started doing things that made me feel good about myself, whether it was taking a yoga class, painting my nails a fun color, or just having a girls’ night out with my friends. And you know what? My kids noticed. They saw that mommy was happy and confident, and it rubbed off on them.
Another biggie is giving our kids the freedom to make mistakes. Oh boy, this was a tough one for me at first. I wanted to protect them from every little boo-boo and disappointment. But then I realized that by not letting them fail, I was actually holding them back. When my little one was learning to ride a bike, I was so tempted to run over and hold the handlebars every time they wobbled. But I resisted (well, most of the time). And when they finally took that tumble and scraped their knee, instead of freaking out, I gave them a big hug and said, “You’re okay, baby! You just had a little accident, but you got back up, and that’s amazing!” That moment of resilience, of getting back up after a fall, is what builds confidence. They learn that it’s okay to mess up as long as they keep trying.
Communication is also key. I make it a point to have real, heart-to-heart conversations with my kids. We talk about their feelings, their dreams, their fears. And I listen. I mean, really listen. Not just waiting for my turn to talk, but actually hearing what they’re saying. When my daughter came home from school one day looking really down, I sat her down and asked her what was wrong. She opened up about how she didn’t feel like she fit in with the other kids. Instead of brushing it off and saying something like, “Oh, don’t be silly, you’re great,” I validated her feelings. I said, “I understand why you might feel that way, honey. But you know what? You’re unique and special, and there are going to be people who love you just for who you are.” That simple conversation made her feel seen and heard, and it boosted her confidence knowing that she could come to me with her problems.
Let’s not forget about praise, but the right kind of praise. I used to just say things like, “Good job!” all the time. But then I learned that specific praise is so much more powerful. Instead of a generic “Good job,” I’ll say something like, “I love how you colored that picture. The way you used all those bright colors and stayed inside the lines shows how careful and creative you are.” By highlighting the specific effort or skill they used, they understand what they did well and are more likely to repeat it, which in turn builds their confidence.
And activities! Oh, there are so many great activities that can help boost our kids’ confidence. For example, signing them up for a drama class. When they get up on that stage and perform, even if it’s just a little skit for the parents, they overcome their shyness and learn to project themselves. Or sports! My son joined a soccer team, and not only did he get fit, but he also learned how to work as part of a team, handle competition, and believe in himself when he scored a goal. Art projects are another great one. Letting them create something from scratch and then displaying their work proudly in the house gives them a sense of accomplishment.
In conclusion, parenting with purpose to raise confident children is an ongoing journey. It’s not always easy, and I definitely have my off days where I feel like I’m not doing it right. But as long as we keep trying, keep learning, and keep loving our kids unconditionally, we’re on the right track. So, mamas, let’s raise some confident, amazing little humans together!